JUST SAY NO

I meant to say no. I really did. I just wanted to score a little pot to move around campus to make a few bucks. That’s all. So how did I find myself with a kilo of cocaine to move? And in debt to a man I never wanted to be in debt to. In debt to a one-armed man, no less. Sounds like a cliché, right? “The Fugitive”, right? But George is no cliché. And he is very definitely a man you don’t want to be in debt to.

How the fuck do I move a kilo of cocaine to a bunch of stoners? Hell, if I know.

How did George lose his arm? Hell if I know.

It’s not that there aren’t a lot of arm stories out there. A rattlesnake bite? An off-target shotgun blast? And my favorite, the pissed off alligator. But there is no doubt, that the single limb look, gives George a great deal of cache, in certain circles. And unfortunately, I find myself right in the middle of one of those circles. Like a bullseye in a target.

In an amazing series of “Yes’s” that should have been “No’s”, I’m across the table from a one-armed man who’s wearing a short sleeve Hawaiian shirt, no less. No pinned up long sleeves for George. And when he gets excited his stump pokes out from his sleeve. And George gets excited a lot. Excited, like if was the alligator that got George’s arm, George isn’t wearing alligator shoes by coincidence, kind of excited.

Wanna buy some blow?. . .Please.